OUR FIRST CHILD

Salam...

Another weekend had ended. There are still 4 weeks left before school reopens for the new year on the 4th. of January 2010. 

My third daughter, Fathiah is still struggling with her SPM exam. Two more papers to go before she will finally pack her things and come back home for good.
My second daughter, Nadiah is already home for her summer holidays until end of January 2010. Although she has been home for almost 2 weeks, she still goes to bed not later than 10 pm. and wakes up before 5.00am. the next day. Simply because of the 3 hours difference in time in Australia!

While my youngest daughter, Aisyah and youngest son, Ghazi are still enjoying the holidays. Helping me with the housework, doing their homework, (either being provided by the teacher or by me), their Quran lesson, serving the internet and watching television. There goes their routine for the holidays.
My eldest daughter, Huda is still attending school although the school holidays is only 4 weeks left. Starting from the first day of the SPM exam, she had been on duty as the invigilator in a big school in town. Nowadays, she is seldom at home because of her duty as a warden in the hostel until the SPM exam finishes on the 16th. of December. I could see the tiredness shown on her worn-out face when she comes home, but one thing for sure is, she seldom grumbles...

My hubby is as usual busy with his job...
Well, most of my friends, the ex-SMSJians batch 1974-1978 are planning to attend the Mini Gathering (MG) in Tanjung Malim on the 13th. of December. So, do I. We have been invited by our friends, Prof. Dr. Rosly and Fatimah to attend their first daughter's wedding ceremony. Insyaallah, Fati, I'll be coming with my hubby and children.

What a coincidence! We had our first Reunion for our batch after leaving SMSJ 30 years ago, on the same date last year in Kluang. And another coincidence!! My wedding anniversary falls on the same date, too! This year is our Silver Jubilee (25 years)!!!
We have just celebrated my eldest daughter's birthday more than a week ago, on the 26th. of  November. To think of it, Huda is our First Anniversary gift from ALLAH. Alhamdulillah... I could still remember being admitted to Batu Pahat Hospital in Jln Kluang a few days earlier before I finally gave birth to her. How my hubby had spent the night in our car on the night I went into labour. My! He just dozed off and slept very soundly until the nurse had to knock the windscreen several times to wake him up and told him the good news...! Just imagine, Huda was born at 3.03am! Almost everybody was sound asleep at that hour...

Every child is special in their own ways. As for Huda, besides being our first child, she is also my parents' first grandchild. She is also my parents-in-law first grandchild. Huda is the third generation in my family that pursue "teaching" as a profession after my father and me. Her students addressed her as Miss Radin and I came to know that she is a strict teacher. I guess the personality really suits her as a warden.

As parents, Ayah and Ibu wish you the very best in life. May you succeed well. We love you...

Huda's 1st birthday.

                                         Huda's first car.                                             Miss Radin

Huda and Aisyah's birthday cake.

DEEP DOWN FROM MY HEART

Salam everyone...

It has been quite some time since I've contributed any entries into my blog to be shared with everyone. Finally, we are in the last month of the year 2009, December. Not forgetting, the last month of the Muslim calender, too. Zulhijjah, 1430 Hijrah.

There are  many incidents happening around us, the monsoon season together with the flood in the east coast and the northern states, the Form 5 students sitting for their SPM and the form 6 students with their STPM exams. The pilgrims who went to perform the Hajj, the 5th pillar of the Rukun Islam are making preparations to come back home after performing their rites. School children are on holiday now and are counting the days to go on vacation with their family. Parents, especially mothers are on alert to the Back To School sales promoted by the shopping outlets. Mothers are complaining that they are spending more time in the kitchen nowadays because their children are always requesting a long list of menu each day, especially those staying in the hostels. Mum's Cooking Is Always The Best!

As for me, everything have been going on fine. As a teacher, my career days are coming to an end soon... I've attended school on the 20th. of November 2009, the last day of school. My intention is to meet my colleagues and 'children' there. My! Even before I could open the door of my husband's car, the children crowded and started to call me, "Teacher, you're back! Are you coming to teach us? When will you start work? Why were you absent from school for so long? What have happened to you? Teacher,........." The children kept on pouring out questions after questions due to their curiosity instincts. I could not answer to any of the questions, not even one. My heart sank. I was stunned and tried my very best to hold back the tears.

Everyone was eager to shake hands with me until I saw a girl trying to keep her distance from the crowd. Suddenly, a boy called out,"Syidah, come and shake hand with Teacher. Why are you shy? You are the one who have been asking for her all this while..." I called Syidah, and finally, she shook hands with me.

Well, Syidah is someone special in my career life. She is a girl who demands a lot of attention. I started to get to know her when she was in Year 1. Not because I was teaching her, but because of the scabies affecting her fingers. Since I was the teacher-in-charge of the Red Crescent Society in school, her class teacher had sent her to me to do the dressing. So, while dressing the sore fingers, I chatted with her and got to know her better. From that day onwards, she would come to see me every school day to clean the wound until she has fully recovered!

When Syidah was in Year 4 in 2008, I became her class teacher. Almost every teacher who taught her would face problems while teaching in her class. She would distract the other pupils' attention by making noise, disturbing her friends or even leaving the class without the teacher's permission. I have even suggested her name to be included in the 'Pendidikan Khas' class with recommendations from the School Counsellor, but it was rejected. One of the reasons given is that, Syidah could differentiate the teachers in school. She would greet the Ustazah and the other Malay teachers with 'Assalammualaikum', but whenever she saw me and the other English Language teachers she would greet us with 'Good Morning/Afternoon. Even when we were in a crowd, she would greet us differently...

One incident which remained in my mind was the day when she asked me this question. She was doing her Remedial Work as usual during my English lesson. When the other children started to do their written work, she looked into my eyes and asked,"Teacher, why are you always being good to me? Everyone else would usually scold me, but not you." I answered,"No, that is not right. Everyone wants to be good to you, but you did not realize it. Be good to them and then they will be good to you..." Some of my colleagues even nicknamed her as my 'daughter'. Simply because I would keep her books and stationaries on my table in the staffroom. Every morning, she would come to see me and take them while, in the afternoon, she would see me again to return them back. Why? If she was to take those books and stationaries back home, she would come back to school empty-handed the next day, for sure...

Well, back to the reason why I had made an effort to attend school that day, despite of myself being feeble. First and foremost, let me congratulate the Headmaster, Teachers and Pupils of SK Seri Gading for their success in the UPSR 2009. CONGRATULATIONS AND KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK! A rural school achieving 85% and having 9 out of sixty over pupils getting 5 A's including an 86% achievement in English Language is really the sweetest memory to cherish before I finally retire...

Looking back to about 13 years ago when I first came to this school, many changes have been made to the school. I could still remember having to take over the Year 6 Class in June right after waving Goodbye to my Year 6 pupls in SK Taman Setiawangsa in Kuala Lumpur. With a 36% achievement in their UPSR, I started to roll up my sleeves and get started with my job. Well, all in all, it took years and with the cooperation from everybody in the school that the school managed to get up and maintain the good performance. Alhamdulillah... We did it! Everybody in the school is very cooperative. We are like a big family and very united. Be it any projects from whatever subjects or fields, everyone is willing to give a hand. Although I am not ready to retire from being a teacher yet, I have to agree with the cardiologist's suggestions. I have to withdraw myself , but deep down in my heart, I am still yearning to continue teaching...

Last but not least,I have to always remind myself that I am now a RETIRED ENGLISH TEACHER...

TEACHERS OF SK SERI GADING

Front row from left to right: Toyibah, Yusnita, Zaiton, Kamaliah, Kasnan(SKBK), Hj. Hamin (HM), Yusri, Arif, Sheikh and Mutakim.

Back row from left to right: Zehrah(SKC), Nor Ailin(KL), Norha, Muhairani, Roselina, Rohani, Hapizah, Nor Lina, Norfazlina, Mazlina(NS), Nora, Naseem Bibi(SKPB), Suzana, me, Halim and Sakmani(SKPR).

SOME OF THE LADY TEACHERS AFTER THE PTA MEETING

Seated from left to right: Rohaiza, Nor Lina, Mazlina(NS), Kamaliah, me and Nora.

Standing from left to right: Rohani, Norfazlina, Zaiton, Siti Zaleha, Yusnita and Roselina.

AFTER THE YEAR 6 CLASS PARTY

Suzana and me.

SELAMAT HARI RAYA AIDIL ADHA

JEJAK KASIH DI AIDIL FITRI

Alhamdulillah. Hari ini adalah hari ke 29 dalam bulan Syawal dan hari kedua sambutan Deepavali. Terdapat beberapa peristiwa yang menjadi kenangan dalam hidup kami sekeluarga dalam bulan Syawal ini.

Anakanda kami Nadiah bertemu dengan ninda saudara suamiku, Tok Cu Hjh. Halimah binti Hj. Ali yang kebetulan menyambut Aidil Fitri di rumah anakandanya di Melbourne. Ketika menyertai aktiviti perkhemahan di sana, mereka bertegur-sapa dan akhirnya barulah diketahui bahawa mereka adalah bersaudara walaupun sudah lebih 6 bulan Nadiah berkawan rapat dengan anakandanya, Dr. Tuti Iryani.

Ibu saudara sepupu suamiku, Dr. Tuti Iryani bersama-sama 2 orang anakandanya di samping peserta perkhemahan tersebut di Melbourne. Dr. Tuti sedang menyambung pengajiannya di peringkat Phd di sana.

Suamiku, anakanda kami Ghazi dan aku bersama ninda saudara suamiku, Tok Cu Hjh. Halimah binti Hj. Ali di Majlis Rumah Terbuka anakandanya, Dr. Raha di Johor Bahru.

Sebenarnya pertemuan yang tidak disangka-sangka ini telah mengeratkan lagi tali persaudaraan di antara ahli keluarga kami. Tok Cu adalah adik bongsu kepada datuk suami ku. Betapa kecilnya dunia ini...

NADIAH'S STORY

An Analysis Of An Unforgettable Experience

My experience as a carer of a chronic patient who is also my beloved mother, is an unforgettable one. I encountered this incident last year, when I accompanied my mother who was being admitted to hospital due to chronic heart failure. This incident made me realise the major role played by carers, and at the same time caused me to reflect on how patients feel.

During my last summer holiday, after I had my final year examination, I had to rush back home because I had news from my father that my mother was admitted to the Cardiac Care Unit (CCU) due to heart failure.

My mother, who has always been very healthy and energetic, had a dual-chamber pacemaker implanted in 2004 due to a history of hypertrophy obstructive cardiomyopathy (HOCM). Being a dedicated primary school teacher, she used to be active and busy with her workloads, duties and responsibilities. However, last year she was diagnosed with pneumonia that eventually exacerbated her heart condition. She was admitted to the CCU three times in two month. I accompanied her on some of her stays in the CCU.

Spending a total of eight days in CCU taught me many things. I witnessed death and dying patients with various heart problems and elderly heart patients without any relatives visiting. I saw poor chronic patients who were unable to afford the cost of surgical procedures and the required devices, and had to wait for financial support from the Human Resource Centre. Most importantly, how did it feel being a carer of a chronic heart patient, especially when the sick person was the person that I loved most; my mother?

Personally, I had the insight of being a carer to my mother. Besides that, I also learnt the dependency of chronic patients on their carers. I felt very sad when I saw many elderly patients did not have any relatives visiting, and they had to rely on the nurses to do everything; morning cleaning, assisting in eating and drinking, having someone on their side to talk to when they got bored, and most importantly, feeling supported and valued.

There was one day when my mother was on the drug trials, she suffered a very bad chest pain; sharp, centralized and continuous. This may have been due to the side effects of the intravenous drug prescribed. Since that trial, she almost gave up with all the medications given by doctors. She was afraid to experience the chest pain again. At this moment, I personally think that family members or carers play a very important role in giving continuous support and affirming the patients about their compliance towards treatments that will lead to a healthier state.

Most importantly, I realised that to be a carer of a chronic heart patient requires a person to have a strong inner self. Imagine that you are the carer of a heart failure patient, and you witnessed death and dying patients around you. At the same time, the person that you look after is also struggling for his or her life. I wonder how carers feel and cope, as I myself, as a medical student, was shocked to witness an elderly patient beside my mother’s bed die one night due to heart complications. As a medical student, I have been exposed to scenarios in tutorials and understand some of the aspects in dealing with chronic patients who are dying. In relation to the elderly patient who died at the CCU, I wonder how would the carers feel and how they found out about this situation. If they lose their strength and started to think negative, the effects would be on patients.

Being a full time carer makes me think about the support needed by both patients and carers. I was so lucky to have all my friends and seniors, most of whom were interns and medical students. They would understand my mother’s condition both clinically and emotionally. They were always calming me down, lending me their ears and offering their shoulders to cry on. Undoubtedly, sometimes I would feel paranoid and think about the worst of everything. Being a medical student cannot make me run away from being paranoid about sickness, death and dying. Although I had all the medical knowledge and depth of understanding about the issue, it was still hard to face the reality and try to be positive all the time. However, I had no choice other than facing the reality. I had to be strong in order to make my mother to stay strong.

As I was accompanying my mother all the time within the 8 day experience, I got the chance to socialise with some of the elderly patients there and give them some help. One of the ladies, who was hospitalised on the same day as my mother, told me that she was glad and touched to see me accompanying my mother all the time. Therefore, I was thinking about how the patients feel when they have no one to talk to in the hospital, especially in the ICU, where most of the patients are struggling for their own lives. With all the medical equipment and machines surrounding them, and all of the healthcare staffs busy with their own duties, they would surely have no time to talk to the patients.

One particularly demanding thing was the strength needed to keep both my mother and myself to be emotionally positive. At the same time, the bond and relationship between my mother and I was also vital in making sure that my mother would comply with the treatment.

Reflecting back on the incident, I clearly remember about my condition at that moment. I had missed my night sleep almost everyday. My mother had difficulties sleeping at night in the hospital, because she said that if she had shortness of breath, which is quite common among cardiac failure patient, at night, then no one would realise it. Therefore, I kept my mother company, talking and chatting at night when she could not sleep.

Personally, at first, it was hard for me to accept the fact that the person that I used to rely on to share my problems with and seek support now depended on me to give her strength, and most importantly, the strength in continuing her life.

All this while, being a medical student, I always missed looking into the importance of support needed by both carers and patients as an important branch of treatment and management to gain the best health outcome.

However, I am glad that I had learnt something from my mother’s situation. I will always look at patients’ need of support and the role played by carers in providing good care for the patients. Besides that, another important aspect is the support gained by the carers. All of this will eventually lead to the patient’s benefit and the best outcome for them.

It has helped me to think laterally in the management of patients, not only to look at the medical model of the disease, but try to approach one case holistically, taking into account the carers and everyone else around the patients.

Besides that, I also realized about the important role played by doctors and nurses (medical staff) to be able to understand how the patients feel and try to tolerate and get a good insight into the patients. By doing this, a good rapport will be established and at the same time, patients will feel supported and valued.

Apart from getting the insight into how your patients would feel if they do not have any relatives or friends visiting and giving support, a medical practitioner should try to think laterally, to figure out ways that could make their patients comply with treatments and medications. When a good rapport is built between the medical practitioner and the patients, the process would be easier. Another aspect that should be looked into is support networks and the current state of the carers. Do they need support? Holistic approach towards a particular disease is the best way to describe this particular issue.

Apart from that, as a future medical practitioner, I would try to get a better insight on how the patients would feel and how do they comply with the medications. It is important to think about all these issues in order to get a better compliance that will eventually lead to a better health outcome for the patients.

***Actually when Nadiah sent this essay in my email, I was very excited to read it. She had told me before that she received compliments from her lecturer for this Critical Learning Incidence essay which is supposed to be her assignment. So, after persuading her to let me read it, I wish to share her story with my blog followers. As her mother, I was so touched by the essay. Without realizing it, my eyes were filled with tears and how my heart wept as I was reading it for the very first time.. Praise be to ALLAH for having those four girls and a boy as my children. I am very pleased and thankful to ALLAH. If at this age, they managed to show their care and concern towards me, God knows what it would be like in the future, Insyaallah. Syukur Alhamdulillah...